Down the River:A Pee-wee Herman Tale
by bigeareevee
Summary: Lets look in the paper...WHOA! Paul Reubens doesn't have a job! Ha! Not surprising!


Lets look in the paper...WHOA! Paul Reubens doesn't have a job! Ha! Not surprising! 

A car is chasing Brock down a highway.

Screen pauses in a Wile E. Coyote/ Roadrunner fashion.

A sign appears under Brock:Brockitis Idious.

Brock:Hey I resent that! I mean *monotone/slowly* Meep meep...

Sign appears under truck:Pikupis Faster--

Pee-wee goes by screen.

Pee-wee:Ha ha ha ha...

Director:PEE WEE! GET OFF THE STAGE WRONG SHOW!!!

Pee-wee:Let's see what the secret word off the day is. It's...

Director:Out!!!

Pee-wee: I guess it will have to remain a secret.

Pee-wee leaves.

Brock runs to side of the road.

Brock:What was that all about?

Ash:I reckon it had something to do with Pee-wee herman.

Misty:Where's our food?

Pee-wee:Mmm. Tacos...

Brock:Uh he stole em.

Ash:I hate to say it to you but you're getting balder, Brock.

Brock:I know. That's why I had the doctor whip up this...

He flashes a bottle.

Phone rings.

Brock:Just a second.

He answers cell phone.

Doctor(On phone):Hi. This is your doctor. I remebered that I accidently prescribed you preperation H. I thought you were complaining about your cronic ass pains. So don't use that as a hair grower. Or your hair will fall out.

Brock:AHHHH!!!!

Misty:Ash, why did he show us hemroid medicine.

Ash:He's probably so proud he can sit again.

Brock's hair falls out.

Brock:My hair! Wahhh! Wahhhhhh!!!

Brock turns around and sobs.

Brock:Hey! Who stole my hair?!

Ash:Get your burnt tree minatures! Get em here while you can. Made from the finest materials. Including popsicle sticks.

Brock:WHY DID YOU ATTACH MY HAIR TO POPSICLE STICKS!??

Ash:What? Did you want one? Sorry sold out.

Misty:You could've at least tried gluing some hair on his head.

Brock:All bald men have to be strong. So I'm getting a peck enlargment.

Brock walks into a pole.

Brock:Ow my dose!

Brock leaves.

Ash:Want to get something to eat because *Loudly*Pee-wee herman stole our food.

Someone:Wahhh. Sniffle. Cry!

Ash:Brock is that you?

Man:Don't looka at me.

Misty:Who's there?

Pee-wee herman steps out.

Pee-wee:Here are your tacos. I sort of ate them and shared one with my chair.

Chairry:Sit on me Miss Yvonne!

Pee-wee:As you probably know. I'm really Paul Ruebens. And My career hasn't been doing to well. My most recent work is Mystery Men. But they screwed me. They said they'd give me 15,000 for the first week up filming. They dumped 40 tons of crackers in my pond and I'm still fighting duck's off my estate! Help me become a star again.

Brock comes back.

Misty:Why are your breasts so big.

Brock:They couldn't under stand me. I said I wanted my pecs enlarged and they thought I said breasts.

Pee-wee:If that's what it takes to be funny I'll do it.

Randy:Hey Ee-wee.

Pee-wee:Shut up you.

He kicks puppet into the lake.

Ash:the first thing we need to do is improve your image. You're too clowny.

Pee-wee:Am not.

Boy:Mommy mommy! Look at the clown

Pee-wee:I suppose you're right.

Ash:Here put on this.

Pee-wee:What is it?

Ash:Just a little sticker.(That reads:I'm with Ass man.)

Misty:Now we need to see if we can steal any bits.

Ash:Lets see some TV.

Announcer:Now back to BARNEY Live!

Barney slides by screen.

Barney:Hya Hya!

Pee-wee:He stole that from me!

Misty:Now Pee-wee you can get al...Pee-wee?

Pee-wee(On TV):You stole that bit from me . Take this. And this!

Barney:Ow! Ow! Ow!

Pee-wee:Have you been sleeping with Miss Yvonne? She never calls anymore! Have you!?

Guards throw him off the stage.

Brock:Ha! Pee-wee beat up a purple Dinosaur! HA!

Stage hand:Hey you! Breast boy? You're on in 5!

He yanks him on stage.

Ash:Boy am I hungry.

Pee-wee opens garbage can.

Pee-wee:Why aren't my refridgerator friends moving!? HELP THEY'RE DEAD!!! AHHHH!!!

Misty:Pee-wee, that's a garbage can.

Ash:C'mon maybe we can get some acts from the Teletubbies.

Telletubbies(High Pitched):HAA HAA!

Pee-wee:You stole my bit! TAKE THIS! AND THIs!

Announcer:We'll be back to Teletubbies Live in a second.

Pee-wee:Come on I can take all of you! You the gay one Your first! RUUUUUUHHHHHH!!!!

He gets ejected from stage.

Pee-wee:I guess a man who was a star in 80's can't survive today.

Pee-wee jumps off the bridge.

Pee-wee:Adieu!

*Spalsh*

Pee-wee:AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

Brock comes running up.

Brock:Guess what! I got a job as the star of a child's show called Breast Boy's Play Hose. I got pee-wee a job as a writer and an extra character

Pee-wee reverses onto bridge.

Pee-wee:!!!!!HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHA

*hslapS*

Pee-wee:!ueidA

Brock:You came back! You heard about the job.

Pee-wee:You stole my name! Breast boy's Play Hose!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Take this. Job?


End file.
